An imagined conversation in Iraq:
Secret Service Agent #1: What the hell happened to you?
Secret Service Agent #2: Didn't you see the news?
SSA #1: No.
SSA #2: I got hit in the head. With a shoe.
SSA #1: Aww, is _____ (insert SSA #2 spouse name) beating up on you again? Looks like she clipped you with a stiletto. You really gotta leave that woman.
SSA #2: No. Someone was throwing shoes at the POTUS.
SSA #1: What?
SSA #2: Some pissed-off person took of his shoes. And threw them at Bush. And it hit me.
SSA #1: Man, that sucks. But you know, at least if you're still around to guard Obama, you'll probably just get hit with a pair of panties. I'm sure _______ would like that.